It was on the church bus.
They saw each other for the first time.
I'm sure for a moment she may have been a little taken back.
This freckled face boy with hair long color of yazoo clay and waved like the water that brought him here.
Brought here for her?
And it's in the moments of complete horror and sadness that only our Father can produce joy.
She was always silly. Never shy or hesitant to make others laugh.
So we weren't sure what was wrong with her on this night.
Her braces had just come off days before and she was excited to turn fifteen.
I can imagine Mom shopping and finding that shiny blue wig - no doubt in her mind Shelby would get a kick out of it - no doubt in any of our minds.
But she didn't. We all thought it was a game when she wouldn't put it on.
But it wasn't. Tears flowed in the back room and nothing - nothing could convince her to give us just one more hat photo to join the collection since she was old enough to know what one was.
But then he quietly found her and they whispered in the corner and I remember thinking that my silly bluebird just wanted him to see her as a young woman instead of a little girl. I remember thinking that night my girl might be in love.
And only one - only one person - convinced her.
And that's the moment I fell for him.
And they both grew up on the ice and hockey players and figure skaters clash - just a little. And the day came they sought out to prove who was better who was faster who was stronger.
And she walked through the door after she went down face sliding on ice.
And she walked through the door after she went down face sliding on ice.
And there was the break-up.
And the make-up.
And the break apart.
And time. And the struggle to stay friends.
The summer apart.
And she didn't know what to do.
And he wanted her back and she wavered scared and only wanted to make this life decision once.
And she was afraid.
But I knew she missed the boy. And on this night sitting and laughing she posted status Will you be my . . .
and she waited. And we laughed and imagined what he was thinking and when she couldn't wait any longer she finished the question and
they found their way back.
She was barely four when she went on her first trip for Jesus. I packed her bag and told her we were trippin' for Jesus. She didn't get it.
Her's not white her's not black me don't know what her is.
And there, with Native Americans, she began trippin' for Jesus.
So when years later took her to Hondurus and she fell grown deeper in love with Jesus and then Tennessee sealed her desire for Him with questions and confusion she came home trying to find her steps and couldn't figure out how to split her heart between the two.
Mama, I only want to be in love with Jesus. I don't know how to have room in my heart for more.
And then the break.
And his heart was broken and he was angry and didn't understand.
And Jesus gently rocked her and led her back.
Then hard days came and she hurt and slept.
I watched him. Wondered what he was thinking. I'm thinking the time away from her had been a blessing. And while she had been struggling with more love than she knew what to do with he was realizing that no matter what life would be - he wanted it to be with her.
She cried. I don't want Joe to have to spend his life with someone that feels bad so much.
Do you remember when Joe was concerned about you being without him? You know his concern about dying young, like his dad, and leaving you and children alone?
You thought that was sweet ridiculous. Even if you knew your time with him would end tomorrow you wouldn't give him up. You're not giving him and his love for you enough credit.
Stop thinking so much, and just love.
And she did. Because from that moment on the bus there really was never another option, was there, my bluebird love?
