For me, too.
I spent my day anxious, worried, concern - how many adjectives are there for a lack of faith? Too many.
I went from the hours of a morning we will remember the rest of our lives into an afternoon that found me falling and failing. Found me allowing hurt to seep in from someone's unkind words. When I should have walked away found me lashing back.
Found me judging, criticizing. Found me breaking the golden rule.
That simple little rule we learned in grammar school so we wouldn't steal pencils or break in line or tease the ones with glasses or gaps in their teeth or hair or skin the wrong color.
The ones we think are less that make us feel more. Shamefully more.
Yeah, it was a bad day baby girl.
And now in the early morning hours of a new day I sit here and write, wondering how you are.
I've written my apology email to one I made feel unwanted and unwelcome and checked my phone to see if there was one for me. I wonder why women hurt women. I wonder why I play the game.
And I wonder how to help you. You my sweet girl, still so young and unknowing. You taking a giant step into the unknown and me still fledging stumbling around in it all these years later.
It's grace. It's a prayer of mercy. I'm praying God give you mercy and grant you all you need in strength and wisdom to not stumble but finish this race that is won with a lowly crawl.
Because that's where you find the answer sweet girl. Low. Face down arms outstretched at the foot of the cross.
Always low at the foot of the cross.
You are never "alone as a solitary bird on a roof."
Psalm 102:7
