Where, oh where, have the years gone?
Thirteen years passed from when that picture was taken and July, 2005. It had been a hard year. 2004 had become a year to not remember, and 2005 was becoming a close second. He's Too Good To Me and I, along with his parents, had been carefully guarding a secret from my oldest baby girl. Sweet Sixteen she was turning.
Secrets are hard to keep in my home. Because I homeschool and my kids think everything is their business, little seems to get by them. I knew she was very wise and had caught on to this secret - a car for her sixteenth birthday.
Let me back up a bit. In March my mama had a stroke. That's a story that stands alone and one day I'll tell it to you. Devastating.
On this hot July day mama had only been speaking again for a month or so, her mind was still child-like, and one could never tell what she might do.
Telephone rings and my mama tells my birthday girl . . .
When you get your car tonight bring it over and let me see it.
Secret, which probably wasn't a secret anymore anyway, was now out. I began to cry. I can be a pretty good actress if I put my mind to it. I begged my child to forgive me for what my mama had said. I told her we tried, we had tried hard, but we just couldn't manage to get her a car. Y'all, I cried good, I cried hard - I was good.
Secret once again was tucked right where it belonged - away from her. She completely believed me. She kept hugging me and telling me it was okay, she had not expected a car. But I knew differently, I knew her heart was disappointed.
This is when she opened her card an hour later and the secret became a surprise. Thank you, Mama, without you that look would not have been possible.
Thank you, Mom and Dad, for helping us with this dream.
Now, almost five years later, that cute, sporty gift is what I not-so-lovingly refer to as a piece of junk.
Back to present day. This is her face the other day when she found her new car and told us about it. She has been car shopping for a couple of weeks, all the while bumming her sister's for school and work.
Her old piece of junk sold and she set her sights on this beauty, which she drove home today.
It has a small payment attached - most dreams do. She works two jobs and goes to school, so more power to her.
2005 was a bad year. The other tears I shed that year were not an act, and all the while I was desperately trying to recover from the pain of 2004. But then there was this . . .
And now there is this . .
Unless something drastic happens in our future that changes the ordinary life we live here I will never be able to give her a gift again that can match that sweet sixteen birthday. Really good thing none of these "things" matter anyway.
"Do not lay up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor urst destroys, and where theives do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." Matthew 6:19-21
It's the joy of secrets and surprises and the glory of watching your child become a young woman that tugs at your heart and causes a new and different kind of tears.
Where, oh where, have the years gone?
